America is not a healthy country. Crazy, right? Whether it be the McDonald’s in every minuscule crevice of the land or the horrendous reality that healthier alternatives to foods often cost more than their sodium-ridden counterparts, America truly pushes a “beautiful” lifestyle. Obviously, because of the over consumption of fat and sugar, every citizen in America can expect to be a heart-burning homunculus within the next decade. Some doctors call it obesity, but they are just being nice. One of the main variables that instigate these incredulous lifestyle choices is the lack of the consumption of water. Why drink water when it is so much easier to drink heart-attack inducing acid? The “acids”, commonly referred to as energy drinks, are carbonated sludges of sodium and sugar that just love to rid your body of all of its primary functions. Especially popular drinks like Monster™.
Energy drinks like Monster are used for a quick boost of caffeine. In modern-day America where people get up early and rest late, a boost of energy may just be a necessity for some. Instead of drinking water for that long term boost of energy, however, they drink stupid energy drinks that quite literally fatigues them. (MedicalNewsToday) Finding that balance between water and sludge is fine, but energy drinks, such as Monster, are on all accounts, unhealthy. Now, imagine taking a popular brand of an unhealthy beverage such as Monster and twisting it into an incredibly unhealthy aesthetic that a specific group of people on the internet try to attune to. All they find themselves drinking is a sodium ridden drink that deprives them of their hair.
Now, who could the group of individuals be? Well, to put it simply, it is gamers. Basement dwellers. Slobs. Degenerates. Any name under the sun to match the unholy cretins that reside within their rooms, shielding themselves from the rays of the sun and the blades of the grass. According to a study, (KeeganEdwards) Monster’s target demographic aligns with young adults, people who have finally gotten away from their parents and don’t have to clean their room or practice proper hygiene.
How could identity relate to Monster drinks? Well, if it isn’t obvious, Monster’s can design is supposed to come off as intense, edgy, or even gothic. Because of the internet’s influence on children, younger generations are now stupid. (EdNC) Furthermore, a popular belief about emos or goths is that they adopt negative attitudes as an outlet for negative stigmas. So if more people are being exposed to negativity, and they are leaning more into edginess, what does that say about them? Other than the fact they might need to see a shrink, they will most likely be purchasing Monster. Why not, right? Why not show their angst through an edgy drink that exemplifies how uncaring they are about the system. Specifically their digestive system, and how they will be dying from cardiac arrest by 30.
Now, does drinking Monster every so often make one, as stated previously, a slob? Sadly, being brutally honest is not allowed, so no. Some people have incredible difficulty attaining the energy required to make it throughout the day. But drinking a Monster to get that energy is stupid, dumb, uneducated, foolish, ignorant, naive, dumb again, and etc. There are so many incredible alternatives such as coffee, green tea, and even water. If one person thinks to themselves, “but water tastes bad.”, then let it be known that they are a child and need to grow up. Or, if another states that, “water won’t give me the energy I need.”, then they are incredibly misinformed. According to Franciscan Health, “Water helps to flush out excess toxins, maintains regularity, transports nutrients and oxygen, and best of all, increases energy and helps fight fatigue.” Water is literally the best drink in the world.
So, please, stop drinking Monster, or any energy drink for that matter. If a boost of energy is needed, try a rarely consumed food product known as a fruit. Fruits contain natural sugar that the body metabolizes much healthier. And, of course, energy drinks aren’t the worst form of a caffeine boost, but it’s highly advised to drink more water than any other fluid. The ratio of water to any other drink should always be abundantly contrasting.
